Okinawa-rama

I helped process my first human remains scene this week. It was very cool and very tedious. We got a call on Thursday that a Japanese work crew found a human skull on a Weapons Range on base. I happened to be within earshot of the Agent on Duty and immediately volunteered my services. We loaded up the Major Case Response Team (MCRT) Van, which I like to call the Mystery Machine, and headed out to the deep Okinawan jungle.

We arrive on scene and the Military Police have secured the area. They've also gone looking around and found a scattering of human remains. Typically it's not a good thing for the MPs to go tromping through a crime scene searching for remains, because of contamination and all, but an overeager Lieutenant was in charge, and it wasn't the first human remains found on base (apparently the Japanese like to commit suicide on our lovely bases) -- so they had experience.

We head in and the first thing we see is the skull, no body, just skull. As we continue the tour, we walk into this draw and start climbing straight up. In case your wondering what a draw is, it's a cut on a side of a hill that is formed by running water. Kind of like a river on the side of a mountain, minus the water. Usually when it rains really hard, water will flow from the sides of the mountain and go into the draw. As we're walking, we have to go under or through head high ferns, bamboo and Spiders. Lots and Lots of Spiders. Really big Spiders. Orange, Black and Green Spiders. I really HATE Spiders.

We find the remains scattered about 100 meters up the draw, so we decide to start working on a plan. Typically, if the remains are of Asian/Okinawan decent, the local Police Department will take over and secure the remains. Fortunately for us, one of our Agents is a Forensic Anthropologist (FA) and by looking at the bones and skull she can determine race and sex. She spends a few minutes looking over the skull and the pelvis and determines that it's an Asian male. Sweeeeet, the Okinawan PD can take it over.

Let me explain why we want the Okinawans to take over the scene. If we do the scene, we do it to American standards, which is to cut down every single plant in our way. Get on our hands and knees, and clear the whole jungle floor, looking for bits of bone, teeth, clothing, etc. This will take several days for us and becomes a major emotional event. The Japanese on the other hand, will come in with a big trash bag, pick up what they see and leave. Total time about 15 minutes. So you see why we want the Japanese to do the scene. Besides, were only concerned about U.S. Service Members' remains, and since none have been reported missing in the last few years, we're pretty certain it's an Okinawan. (Okinawans by the way, have the highest suicide rate in Japan. Mainland Japanese come to Okinawa to commit suicide. Go figure.)

Anyway, the local Japanese Police (JP) arrive and our FA Agent explains that the bones are of Asian descent and that they should take the scene. The senior JP officer looks at our "young female" agent and says in Japanese (translation from our Japanese Investigator) "Because you describe it like this, you think we should take over the scene." Hell yes, is what I was thinking. He ho's and hum's for a while and says, "Let me call my boss."

He comes back and tells us, "You collect the remains, send it to our Ryuku University, if they determine it's Asian, we'll take the case." Then we explain, if we take over the scene, the remains will go to our forensic laboratory in the U.S. Then they'll tell us it's an Asian Male, they'll send us back the remains, which we will in turn hand over to the Japanese Police. This will take anywhere from 4-8 months. That's 4-8 months they could be trying to find the family of this guy.

Well, they refuse and we're stuck processing the scene. More to follow...

I'm thinking about enrolling Kelly.

-Joe :)

Before coming here, I (Joe) was reading a blog by a Junior High school teacher in Japan and the crazy experiences he's had. One of the things he seemed to talk a bit about is this game the young kids play called "Koncho". The game is played like this, the kids put their hands together, kind of like in the prayer position. Then they find an unsuspecting person and quickly jam their fingers in the crack of the persons ass. Crazy right, I don't remember ever playing this game as a kid and I hope this game doesn't become popular in the states. Here's the link to the site if you want to read some stories:

Outpost Nine

Anyhow, I went back to the U.S. this past week for some training on Sexual Assault Investigations (Oh lovely Brunswick, GA) and as I was going up the escalator in Kansai Airport this little shit jams his fingers in my ass! Scared the living crap out of me, I damn near knocked the person over in front of me. I turned around and the poor parents of this kid were horrified that their baby would shove his fingers in the ass crack of some crazy looking American. So what do you do in a situation like this...I just laughed my ass off and flicked the little boogers ear. Those crazy Japanese...

Today I had my third Japanese lesson. I arrived on time for the first time, which was a good start. And my teacher, "Hoshidai Sensei" actually greeted me in Japanese. Yeah! I was optimistic about the day's lesson. And with reason. This time our thirty minute discussion about why my lesson should or should not be conducted in Japanese was more therapeutic than frustrating. I heard her side, she heard mine, and we began and I learned.

Still. She just cannot seem to resist translating. I've come up with a helpful strategy, however. Just talk the whole time, so that she cannot get a word in edgewise. (That makes it sound like I know a whole lot of Japanese. I don't. I just speak really really slowly!) I also notice myself raising my hand up to her in a "stop" gesture and telling her "Japanese, please" when she wants to interrupt me with her English. Probably very rude practices. But then I say "excuse me" (sumimasen) about 5000 times and do a mini head-bow thing to try to convey some sense of humility. I'm sure she sees right through me though.

Oh, and you know what other dumb thing I did? I went and told her that I was gonna learn Japanese faster than any of her other students! She had said, "I've never had any other students say that they want to learn your way before. But we can do it that way if you want. I just don't want you to say you didn't learn anything." (Hmmm...didn't you tell me that last week?) So, I had to go and say, "Maybe I'll start slow, but just you watch. Soon I'll be speaking better than any of your other students." Crap. What did I do that for? Now I have to study!

Well, time for sleep now. Hasta la pasta

-Kelly

P.S. My new favorite Japanese word is "-no" It makes a words possessive, just like adding an 's to something. "Kellyno senseiwa nipponjin desu." (Not sure if that's right...wanna guess what it means?)

Sorry for the bad quality, but the video had to be compressed. If you want the good quality video I can send you the DVD!!

-Joe

P.S. Make sure you turn the volume up. The music's good! - Kelly

Kudos to our Abby. She's making it big in the food world. Check out her bio on the James Beard website. http://www.jamesbeard.org/events/2006/03/002.shtml

Go girl!

So, I've had two Japanese lessons so far. They're private and at this lady's house. She advertised herself as a "certified teacher." She speaks very good English. So good, in fact, that she doesn't like to speak Japanese at all. It's almost as if speaking Japanese is an imposition.

I picked up on this pretty quickly in my first class, but I thought hey, it's the first day, I'll let it go. But on the way out the door, I told her that the next time she could feel free to speak Japanese with me. But in the next class, she didn't. So I told her that I would like to speak Japanese in my JAPANESE class and she spent the next 25 minutes (really) telling me why that was a bad idea. I told her, well, just let me know if you don't wanna do it and I'll get out of your hair and be on my merry way. She said okay, I'll teach you in Japanese...if that's what you want. Then she finally started teaching me in Japanese. And it was great!... for a while, until she started explaining everything to me (in English of course). And man, once she started, she couldn't stop. Anyway, the good news is that the second class was better than the first one. Hopefully she'll get used to letting me learn and stop feeling so damn guilty about not being able to explain everything.

She's a nice lady by the way. Don't mean to diss. Just need to vent. Different cultures, different education systems, different views on what a teacher should be doing and what a student should be doing and all of that. yadda yaddah

Anyway, hope all is well and you're having a good week.

xxoo kelly

ps. we got our wedding pictures! they're great!

I caught my first Okinawan fish this weekend. It's a pretty cool trumpet fish. I was trying to ask some local Japanese fisherman what you call this fish in Japanese, we did a lot of gesturing and grunting and one of the guys looks at me and says in broken engrish, "Yellow fish." So here's my Yellow Fish.

I read this article about the use of beetle's to dye foods and drinks such as Dannon Yogurts and Ruby Red Grapefruit Juice. I personally have no aversion to eating bugs, but some might. So, if you're a vegetarian you might want to think twice about drinking that beautifully red glass of Grapefruit juice.

-J

Courtesy of ABC News:

Jan. 27, 2006 — "Beetlejuice" is more than just a movie name — foodmakers regularly use crushed female cochineal beetles to dye food, particularly certain yogurts, juices and candy, The Wall Street Journal reported today.

While shocking, it's perfectly legal, the paper reports. Foodmakers don't have to list the bug-based ingredient, because beetles are part of nature. Only man-made dyes, like FD&C Red No. 40, have to be listed.

But that may change soon. The Food and Drug Administration may recommend that companies list beetle additives as "carmine" or "cochineal."

Why? Using beetles in food proves problematic for vegetarians, people who keep kosher and for those with certain food allergies.

The public health advocacy group Center for Science in the Public Interest has long asked the FDA to change the requirements for food labels so that they more clearly state ingredients that could conflict with people's diets or trigger allergies.

As it states on its Web site: "Cochineal extract is a coloring extracted from the eggs of the cochineal beetle, which lives on cactus plants in Peru, the Canary Islands and elsewhere. … These colorings have caused allergic reactions that range from hives to life-threatening anaphylactic shock."

Other Links:
Snopes.com
Google Answers

Hello. Good morning. Currently sitting in my armchair, drinking a beer and making a CD of boy and girl band songs. Any nominations? I've rediscovered music downloading. I used to do it all the time and fill up my MP3 for NYC subway trips. Now I need it so I can listen to music at work. Present favorites are Sumiko's reggae CD and the Latin mix disk I got from Amy Scott. (Thanks Amy!) I made a little more old school mix of Stevie Wonder and Sly and the Family Stone and stuff, but that doesn't seem to be too popular in the frame shop. So, I'll give boy and girl bands a try.

Am working on finishing that post on the old lady. I'll hop to it now. I hope you're having a good March. What's new?

-K